As the saying goes, “Good things come to those who wait.” When it comes to heading out to your favorite nightlife venue or concert, this is especially true. Our friends across the pond call it “queuing.” The simple act of standing one after another has been ingrained into our collective mindset since we were in kindergarten (remember going to the lunch room, gymnasium, bathroom?). As human beings we have been trained and conditioned through childhood to know how to sit back, wait your turn and not piss off the person in front of you. However, there is standing in line… and there is STANDING IN LINE. There is a certain code of conduct, a certain social etiquette that should be followed at all times while queuing.

The Do’s and Don’ts of the Nightclub Line

Do
- Be Patient

Do Not
- Be so patient that you wait for your friends to come talking over after you hold their place in line for an hour.
There is nothing more annoying and infuriating than someone who graciously takes it upon themselves to hold the spot for their comrades who were too lazy to stand in line for themselves. 1. Standing in line is a testament to how much you want to get into the club. It’s the time we put in to make it to the top. No pain no gain, feel me? It is not and will never be alright to hit up your little brother on his iPhone to see how far he is from the door and than join him with two people left in front of him, let alone guys.

Do
- Be polite and friendly to your neighbors in line.

Do Not
- Jump into their ultra personal conversation with absolutely no knowledge of their life or what they were talking about to begin with!

While yes, it’s just fine to say hello to your fellow line mates and make polite conversation, there is nothing more ‘douschelike’ than to completely assume that you know everything about somebody just because you’ve been eaves dropping on their conversation for the last 15 minutes. The reason? Awkwardness. If the conversation becomes slightly strained, you will still have to stand next to this person for an unforeseen amount of time, and that kind of irritation could completely ruin the event you are lining up for in the first place. Save yourself the hassle and keep it light.

Do
- Be friendly to the staff of the club, especially those tending to the door.

Do Not
- Hassle the staff due to wait time, or anything else you might feel that you are entitled to.

What’s the biggest rule for those who go to restaurants? Don’t mess with the people who make/serve your food. The same rule applies for those who are the great deciders upon where you will be spending your evening. The worst thing you can do is hassle the staff/bouncers/cashiers about the wait time. You are not on the guest list, which is the whole reason you are waiting in line to begin with! Kindness, however, can take you from the “never getting in” line to the “next to get in” designation. Make nice with the staff and they will be nice back. The same applies to everyone who works a service job in New York City.

Do
- Pregame

Do Not
- Get so wasted while pre-gaming that you can’t even stand under your own power let alone find your ID and cash to get into the Club.

This is pretty straightforward. There’s nothing that can kill a whole line’s great mood than some drunk dude falling into everyone and dry heaving into the bushes while waiting in line. Although it seems really funny at first, that good 30-45 minute wait to get in will get really claustrophobic really fast, if Mr./Mrs. “I can’t handle my liquor,” targets you, your friends or your significant other to be their next best friend/projectile vomit receptacle. Get your swerve on before you hit the club to save some cash, but do it in a way where you won’t be defined by the bouncing staff as “the dude who’s the first to get thrown out tonight.”

If you stick to these rules, and also use a little common sense, you can enjoy your queuing experience to its fullest potential! Keep in mind anything that would annoy/bother you while standing in close quarters with a whole bunch of other people, will most likely annoy/bother someone else in the same, if not much more severe fashion. Avoid the awkwardness and irritation and be polite!

by Pete Tremblay
11.19.2009
Clubplanet.com